Mittwoch, 2. Dezember 2020

Ubisoft continue to taunt me with giant, powerful girls

A portrait screenshot of Athena in Immortals Fenyx Rising, in her true form, which is that of a giant brunette with blue eyes. She is holding a spear in her right hand, and is wearing a helmet sort of perched on top of her head, presumably so it doesn't ruin her hair.

A while ago I commented on the hugeness, and powerful auras, of the women in Assassin’s Creed Odyssey’s godly DLC. And their hugeness was only a step up from Kassandra, already a big hench mercenary girl about a foot taller than any other human that dared to look at her.

Then they brought out Assassin’s Creed Valhalla, a Viking epic starring Eivor, who is a blonde giantess with massive boots who kicks over tables and won’t put up with literally anything from literally anybody. And now, there is Immortals Fenyx Rising, which sprung its massive god women on me without any warning. I am starting to suspect that the Anvil engine became sentient in the last few years and if you don’t put a certain number of giant ladies in your game it just stops working and sulks – in which case the Tom Clancy series is about to get really awesome.

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