Last week our resident novelty-guzzling elder god the Maw ate me, as Julian sorrowfully reported. Well, I'm back in the waking world, and not as smelly as I could be, all things considered. I've been eaten by the Maw a few times now, but this is the first time I've managed to escape via one of its mouths, rather than by way of… other orifices.
"ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED," I bellow, straightening heroically with my shoulders braced against the cyclopean gums, as chunks of rancid Call Of Duty DLC sluice between my ankles. "MY OTHER CAR'S A MOTHRA", I roar, as the other RPS staff hastily gather with a jump net. "HERE ARE SOME NEW PC GAMES," I add, throwing myself into the waiting arms of my brethren.
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