Saturdays are for eagerly sitting beside the front door to the Treehouse ready to jump up and greet writers as they return home. Sure, most of the team aren't due back until Monday, but this way I can get really good at saying 'Here comes trouble' in just the right intonation. 'Here comes trouble.' No, that's not it. 'Here comes trouble.' Better, but it still needs work.
It's a bad idea to predict a year's worth of Videogame Happenings while you are delirious with cold, but one of the advantages of being delirious with cold is that you become incapable of noticing that ideas are bad. In the brief interval before I eat a bowl of cakemix and fall asleep, here are some quick opinions about the Trends and Tribulations of 2026, mostly based on our reporting from 2025. The evergreen short version: it's never too late to get back into amateur dentistry.
Oodles of games are coming out in 2026, and many look impressive. There's the new Resident Evil, yet another reimagining of Tomb Raider 1, and a 007 game that reminds me of the often-forgotten cartoon series James Bond Jr. All will probably be decent, and some might even dictate my guide writing duties.
We eight scribes from RPS are, Bearing jokes, we wrote in the past, Christmas crackers, god we’re knackered, After twelve months of graft.
O, reader of wonder, loved the most, Why not subscribe to Supporters posts? January leading, still proceeding, See you once we’ve munched our roasts.
But first, time to enjoy your lovely joke!
Here we go. The picks of mine which made it into the advent calendar weren’t embarrassing enough, so now I get to flick a few extras at you like discarded bits of liquorice I’ve found down the back of the sofa. Open wide.
We eight scribes from RPS are, Bearing jokes, we wrote in the past, Christmas crackers, god we’re knackered, After twelve months of graft.
O, reader of wonder, loved the most, Why not subscribe to Supporters posts? January leading, still proceeding, See you once we’ve munched our roasts.
But first, time to enjoy your lovely joke!
Most anticipated? Oh reader, you gentle, innocent child. Hark at you, ambling in here with supple joints, eyes clear as springwater, and the scent of hope in your hair. I have grown old, dear reader. I no longer feel this emotion called "anticipation", anymore than I remember the taste of strawberries in the Shire. Years of waiting for another Legacy of Kain game have broken my spirit. My heart is a sponge of sorrow. My beard coils round my ankles like a listless cat. All has become grey.
